Come with me

   It was the last day of work, every second of the day felt more precious than ever. She's gonna leave this place. All the memories. All the flashbacks. All the visualisations. They felt so precious. It hurts just thinking of leaving the very place where she first felt that strange feeling. She'd never wanna let it go. It was her first. He was her first. She felt it.  The strongest in that small cubicle where he always stood. Where she could always find him and held her breath without realising it a moment later.
     Then,time flew and the day went by swiftly. She still stood there, entering her own little world by the corner, oblivious to all the beings around her.While she was floating in her thoughts, a tall breathless guy came running in. He had on a black shirt and a pair of jeans. While panting heavily, his eyes were wide. Desperate to find the only person he came running all the way here for. Then he stood motionless. His eyes finally caught sight of her, standing alone by the corner. His senses pulled him closer to her.
      He stood there, an inch behind her. She felt his breath. She saw his shadow but still, she couldn't move. He held out his hand and turned her to face him. He tilted her chin slightly, gently with the slightest touch. Their eyes met. Both frozen and lost in each other's eyes. They stood there staring at each other for a few moments. And he finally spoke, "I came for your love...




I dreamt...

Kehadiranmu sepi

Dunia,
Mengapa engkau menjauhiku?
Adakah engkau merajuk kerana aku sering ke alam fantasiku berbanding alam nyatamu?
Aku akui,
Diriku kini sudah jauh berubah,
Tetapi itu bukan salah ku,
Engkau yang berubah dahulu.
Engkau tinggalkan ku terkapai seorang diri dalam lautan jiwa penuh gelora.
Mengapa engkau diam saja?
Padahal engkau tahu,
suatu hari nanti diri ini akan temui titian sengsara itu.

Engkau penipu!
Selama ini dalam kesetiaanmu tidak pernah engkau beritahu ku.
Kejamnya engkau,
sanggup kau biarkan aku lalui kepedihan ini tanpamu.

Aku terkilan,
Namun,
tidak akan ku diamkan.
Tidak lagi!
Aku akan bangkit,
Kau lihat saja.
Diriku yang kecil ini tidak akan ku biarkan kau tipu lagi.

Aku akan bangkit,
Kebahagiaan itu milik aku!
Dapat ku rasa kewujudannya sedang memanggilku.
Walaupun beribu batu harus ku langkah,
Aku sanggup,
Kerana aku yakin...

float me

Lend me this serenity,
If you're kind enough,
I'll open up.
Let me float,
If not in the clouds,
Just in your heart,
I'll be here,
Remembering,
To strengthen my days,
To not fall to the ground,
To not surrender in darkness,
Just,
To find happyness,
in your serenity...

Pergi...

Ya Allah,
Ampunkan Amy kerana membenci perasaan suci ini yang telah Engkau anugerahkan kepadaku.
Ampunkan Amy kerana terpaksa mengkufuri nikmat yang pasti Engkau bekalkan kepada setiap hambaMu.
Ampunkan Amy kerana telah berlaku zalim terhadap diriku yang sememangnya milikMu.
Ampunkan Amy kerana pertama kali enggan menerima rezeki yang telah Engkau sediakan untukku.

Ya Allah,
Aku hanya ingin melihatnya bahagia.
Bahagia keranaMu, sedih keranaMu.
Aku ingin dia melihat duniaMu dari mata hati seorang hamba yang lemah dan hina.
Aku tidak rela membiarkan dia pergi tanpa arah tujuan menuju ke jalanMu.
Kerana itu, aku tetap mengharap, menunggu dan terus berdoa.
Tetapi, sehingga saat ini aku tetap keliru,
mengapa dia ya Allah?
mengapa dia yang Engkau pilih?
mengapa cintaku yang Engkau pilih untuknya?
Aku tidak rela.
Ampunkan daku, sungguh aku tidak rela,
Kerana dia sudah berpunya.

Ya Allah,
aku hambaMu yang sangat lemah.
Dugaan yang Engkau berikan kepadaku kini semakin melemahkan diriku.
Lepaskanlah aku ya Allah.
sungguh aku tidak mampu...
Izinkanlah aku bahagia

Futile

Ya Allah,
I miss You,
yet You've been with me all this while.
I'm sorry for being so ungrateful these past few days,
I've been lost in my own little world,
insecurity has been following me around all day,

the world just seems so cruel,
it makes me miss You more than ever,
I feel so fragile like a piece of glass,
yet that piece of glass is safely wrapped up,
sealed,
invisible...
untouchable...


Ya Allah,
I've always turn to You for comfort,
I've always asked for wishes my whole life,
but this time,
the wish i'm asking for is ineffable,
sometimes I stop breathing,
guilt will conquer me every time,
but I kept goin,
believing,
even though I knew,
deep down,
I would never deserve something so perfect.